Back to School Jitters

I think we all remember the days just at the end of the summer holidays when its inevitable. School is about to start again. For me it’s a vivid memory. It’s this mix of eager anticipation of what the new year will bring, excitement to see friends again but also worry and stress - how will I be doing this grade? Am I going to make it in Chemistry, is Math going to be even harder?

So it did not surprise me that I got a little nervous on behalf of my boys. This year is different though. When we moved to Germany in 2019, we had been living in America for 6 years and in Australia a few years before. All the education that the kids had up until that point was in English. It’s kinda cute. Rudi went through this phase of having a thick, Osttraayaaan version of Sydney English to full force Mid-West USA. There was a day when he disappointingly showed us his spelling-test mistakes just after we had moved to the US. Instead of “Monster”, he just wrote what he had heard “Manstr” - the teacher did not find it cute. I did.

Anyways, when we had arrived in Germany in 2019, we decided to put them in an international school in Berlin. The logic was that since it’s going to be super multicultural and all the lessons are in English, the landing will likely be soft. They will likely make friends easily, they will likely enjoy themselves. It came at a price we were willing (and able) to pay.

Now that we’ve been here for almost 4 years, I am noticing that their German is getting better but it’s nowhere near fluent. It’s not enough to have a full conversation or listen to a lecture or even fully understand what the latest Gaming YouTuber is talking about.

So we decided to give them a choice: What if you left the international school and went to to a local school?

My sales pitch must have been particularly bad because initially there was not much enthusiasm for my idea. Eventually they came around though. The big killer argument was the commute. Since we had moved outside of Berlin to Falkensee, the commute was now 1 hour each way. Broken into walking to the train station in the early morning, taking the regional train to the main station, waiting for the bus, taking the bus, walking some more and eventually arriving at school around 8.

At this stage they would already be pretty exhausted. I am proud of them, after an initial week of complaining, they were real champions. Charley even did the trek by himself a few times.

Now back to me selling: “What if there was no more commute, Imagine what you could do with additional 2+ hours every day” That sealed the deal.

So as of 5 days ago, both Rudi and Charley are now going to local schools. The night before the first day, on Sunday, they were both up till Midnight and I also had horrible sleep worrying on their behalf.

My self-talk was though the roof: Will they find their way around the new school, will they have good teachers, how will they get on with their half German, will the other students make fun of them or worse, will they be outsiders…

I shared those worries with Naura, my wife and we both were on edge for sure. We did not tell the kids, we made brave, confident faces.

It’s Friday now as I am writing this and the first week is drawing to a close.

Charley already had multiple play-dates after school, he has a classmate who lives just down the street. In the morning they meet up in front of the house and cycle together. The other day, I cycled to school shortly after them to spy a little. I saw Charley and a few other kids loudly chatting and laughing near the bike racks. Phew, he seems to have connected!

Now Rudi, 14 is a difficult age to change schools, let alone change languages. His conclusion after a few days: “It’s probably an 8 out of 10 so far, the teachers are really cool and the school is easy enough to navigate. What I liked most is how nice my classmates were, they immediately took me in and asked me about my life and shared about theirs”

And that’s when this huge boulder dropped off my heart. My little boys, they will be just fine. I can trust in their abilities to connect with people, their kindness and their curiosity and joy for life to create meaningful bonds quickly.

As I am writing this, I feel grateful, calm and really proud.

No more 1h train commute to school!

New friends.